Is Abortion Discuss-able?
This is an opinion piece and primarily a question. I do not know everything and I am not in control of policy making. I am hoping to be met with civil and thoughtful responses, though that may be wishful thinking. This post has been boiling up for quite some time. The Planned Parenthood videos have brought renewed interest and debate or fighting to an old topic: Abortion. I'm sure this post will bring criticism from multiple sides. I'm hoping that there will be at least a piece of it that rings true for everyone as well. I am not going to talk about the videos themselves. In fact, the issue of fetal tissue sale or donation is of little interest to me. Once someone is dead, what happens to their parts is of little consequence to me. In fact, I think it’s much better that the parts are used for science or for someone else’s body than simply thrown away. I plan for my body to be donated first to save anyone my organs can, then whatever is left to be used for scientific research. That said, the videos did show very graphic and disturbing images of fetal body parts. That, for me, is what we as a society should be talking about: not clumps of cells, body parts, not what happened after they were parts but what caused them to go from a body to parts to begin with.
To be fair and transparent I must make my positions clear upfront regarding this issue and surrounding issues. I am staunchly antiabortion. I hope that during my lifetime abortion will become unthinkable, and regardless of legality will only be discussed as an option if a woman will die if no abortion is performed. Unfortunately, the media is only showing polar opposites in rhetoric: those who #StandWithPlannedParenthood, even making fun of abortion as if it is insignificant, and GOP candidates who tend to talk about unborn children until they are born and pregnant women as if they don’t matter. I have seen people who support the right to an abortion, but would prefer women to exercise a different right or avoid unwanted pregnancy altogether, and I have seen Pregnancy Resource Center workers and others willing to do anything possible to help women experiencing a crisis pregnancy (other than an abortion). Unfortunately, while I think those kinds of people are the majority out there, they aren’t getting media coverage. We just have two extreme groups shouting at each other. While I am opposed to abortion, I do not view myself as anti-woman. I really believe that women should have control of their lives and their bodies. I support women having access to birth control. I also support comprehensive sexual education. At the same time I think that truly comprehensive sexual education will educate young men, women, and non-binary alike about not only the mechanics of sex and how to put on a condom or get birth control pills, but also valuing their bodies and the bodies of others in a way which aligns with their own morals and ethics, and supports a care for self and others. While I have some specific opinions about how that can be best achieved it's not really my place to determine that whatsoever anyone other than myself and my future children--I mean way we discuss it, I certainly can't control what my future kids do! The reason that I feel I can be both antiabortion and pro woman, is because once a woman is pregnant there are two bodies involved. Sometimes that second (unborn) body is also female. This is scientific. There are two hearts two brains two sets of DNA, etc. even those who support abortion rights are no longer denying the humanity of the unborn just whether or not the unborn should have personhood. I understand abortion has been, is, and will always be a touchy and complex topic. Because of the location of the unborn child, that child's right to be born can only be supported by infringing on his or her mother's right to not be pregnant. The current tactics of the pro-life movement understandably turn off a lot of people. The woman carrying the fetus is often rhetorically reduced to an incubator, in the way that many antiabortion politicians discuss the subject. This is wrong. At the same time I've seen many abortion rights supporters talk about the growing child as if he or she is a parasite, while at the same time celebrating the pregnancies of their friends and family or themselves who want to carry a child to term. This is logically inconsistent. As far as I'm concerned every human has equal ontological value. I believe for the most part those who support abortion rights agree with this sentiment regarding every human other than unborn humans. I don't think it has to be such an either/or. If we are going to help make a better future for everyone it actually has to stop being an either/or. Women need to be supported as people. All preventative measures for unwanted pregnancies need to be readily available. At the same time I hear far too many women in my life who have had abortions describe it as what they perceived at the time to be their _only_ choice. Some of these women deeply regret their abortions and some do not. I do not hate these post-abortive women. I am sad that they felt they had to have an abortion and I feel sad that their unborn child(ren) had to perish. I understand how women in the situation of an unplanned pregnancy could feel that way. The false dichotomy that they perceive is: give birth to this child and have a horrible life or have an abortion. I think some of those who proclaim to be pro-life may be a part of this miss-conception. I may have even been a part of it some point! This is unfortunate. We must stop shaming women. Instead we must work for real choices: paid maternity leave, free day cares in places of employment, more education and acceptance of adoption, and contraceptive methods that are both reliable and also don't harm women's health. I realize that plenty of people will tell me that the only way to achieve some of the things I'm listed above is to keep abortion legal as it is today. I disagree. However, regardless of its legal status, I do think that we need to do more to support women as well as their children. I think the only way were going to do this is to be able to discuss this issue across the aisle. Sometimes I post some of my feelings on Facebook about this subject. Usually I get two kinds of responses: those who wholeheartedly agree with me, maybe even don't think I've gone far enough to the pro-life side or those who accuse me of being a backwards thinker, the cause of women's death or something else like that. Recently I got a different kind of response. Two individuals that I know primarily from Facebook though I do know them from academe as well applauded to me for at least taking a different angle. I felt encouraged. As a former speech and debate competitor who became an academic who dabbles in entertainment, I realize I have surrounded myself with people who vehemently disagree with my position on this most of the time. I also have plenty of positions that they tend to agree with: no guns, avoid war if it all possible, avoid the death penalty if it all possible, stop discrimination, rescue instead of breed animals, label our foods correctly, reform our farming techniques so that they are kinder to the environment and never torture animals, feed the hungry, house the homeless, support our veterans, better mental health care, support high quality education, reform our methods of policing, and continue to strive for racial and gender equality. In the bay we are trained to be able to discuss things in a civil manner, to exist in a room with others to argue against everything we are arguing for. Sometimes this gets ugly but usually it stays pretty civil. It is my hope that even the toughest of issues can be discussed civilly in our society. Otherwise I don't think we have any hope for solutions. I know we all have our pet issue, the problem in the world that speaks most to our hearts. Abortion may not be that one for you, but it is for me. You may decide that it's only a big issue to me because I was adopted, raised Christian, or because I plan to adopt. You may decide that I'm simply out of touch or a rebel-rouser. You're allowed to think whatever you want. My question is this: Is abortion discussable?